Things I Wish My Father Had Told Me: Guidance for Life's Uncharted Journeys is a heartfelt collection of motivational sayings crafted to awaken courage, joy, and inner liberation by Leonard Lee Adams Jr., a former U.S. Army counselor whose life has been shaped by overcoming severe childhood trauma and abuse. It has been revised from its original version to include an introduction describing examples of childhood abuse and trauma he knew he had to overcome before he could live a happy, loving, forgiving, and peace-filled life, as well as refined and updated chapter contents.
Author Background
Adams grew up in the 1960s-70s on Chicago's South Side, enduring physical abuse, neglect, and the absence of a father figure for much of his life. These early experiences led him to become a professional counselor, working in some of the most challenging environments - including prisons and even death row - where he counseled thousands on overcoming fear, addiction, hatred, and despair. His own journey of recovery, forgiveness, and self-worth became the foundation for his writing.
Themes and Content
The book is a collation of honest, hard-but-needed advisories delivered with "tender tenacity". It offers practical, compassionate guidance on:
- Forgiveness - not as condoning harm, but as freeing yourself from its grip.
- Self-love and self-worth - learning to value yourself without waiting for others to affirm it.
- Overcoming abandonment, sorrow, rage, and loss - finding hope even in the darkest times.
- Breaking cycles of self-isolation - recognizing that you are not alone and that healing is possible.
- Living with dignity - setting boundaries, rejecting false standards, and creating your own "oxygen" in life.
Style and Approach
The work is structured as random snapshots of wisdom, making it accessible and easy to read. Adams speaks directly from his own life, drawing on real events to illustrate his points. His tone is both practical and poetic, blending professional counseling insight with personal vulnerability.
Audience and Impact
Adams describes the book as "what one might give someone drowning, if you wanted to save them". Readers have praised it for its powerful, tear-inducing wisdom and its ability to inspire action - to "bring the love" and "make the world a better place". It's aimed at anyone struggling with trauma, fear, or the search for meaning, offering a clear, caring message of hope.
Summary
Things I Wish My Father Had Told Me is a concise, deeply personal guide to healing, forgiveness, and self-empowerment. It's a product of Adams' decades of counseling experience and his own transformation from victim to healer, making it both a self-help resource and a compassionate companion for those in pain.
