Chris AuCoin was the epitome of strength, bravery, and professional profi ciency, a Marine who later rose through the ranks of the New Hampshire State Police and SWAT Team, securing a reputation for excellence, competency, and dependability. A beloved son, brother, husband, and father of three girls, Chris was an icon in the New Hampshire law enforcement community. Known as "the rock," nothing rattled Chris-not the life-or- death nature of his job, his military past, or the medical challenges he endured. Chris was the toughest man anyone knew, until he wasn't. Over the course of a decade, Chris was violent and unpredictable, destructive and dangerous-and then, calm, apologetic, and committed to a restoration of peace. Eventually, the pain became too powerful. One December night in 2022, Chris entered the woods near his home in New Hampshire, burrowed into the frozen frost of the underbrush, and took his own life. This is the recounting of an extraordinarily courageous life, and the cataclysmic impact of addiction, and psychological despair. Filled with personal accounts of those closest to Chris, his story exposes the magnitude of PTSD in our culture, law enforcement communities and military veterans: How a physical specimen of strength and profound achievement can still succumb to the invisible disfi gurements of this insidious disease. All proceeds benefi t veterans' and law enforcement support organizations.